You know I’m a very sickly person and a stubborn one too. When you put the two together what you really have is trouble. When I was 12, I had my first asthma attack. I had a 40 + degree fever for 2 weeks, a cough and cold. I was in bed the whole time and couldn’t eat anything but noodles and bread. I think that was because my throat was sore. My memory’s a little fuzzy. Anyway, I started wheezing and I could hardly breathe. I didn’t want to sleep at night because I was afraid I may not wake up the next day. I had chills and was covered in a thick blanket that didn’t help much really. I was hardly ever awake or aware of what was going on around me. I was always drifting in and out of consciousness. That was the second time that I thought I was gonna die.
The first time was when I was 4 years old. My two older cousins were looking after me and my 2-year-old sister for the day. We were walking home and my sister and the cousin who was holding her hand crossed the street. Now I wanted to go with them and I went and crossed the street on my own, which is something that a 4-year-old should never do by the way. The other cousin who I was with didn’t even realize that I was gone. Now it was about 6 pm that time and it was getting dark. This tricycle (if you don’t know what it is, you’ll have to look it up) comes and just bulldozes me. The driver was drunk. My right foot was stuck at the engine and I could feel stones grazing my back from the uncemented street. I was getting dragged down the street with my foot in the engine spewing blood whenever I try to free it! Needless to say, I was screaming my head off! I must have passed out at that point. The next thing I knew I was at the operating table. The doctor was trying to get the pieces of glass and debris stuck in my foot. Yeah the engine ate away a part of my flesh. Yes, it hurt like hell! I didn’t speak for weeks after that. It was very traumatizing for a child.
Experiences like these and the pneumonia I just had, all taught me though to accept death as a part of the universe that we exist in. I feel that I am more ready for it than people who never get sick and think that they are invincible. When you are brought face to face with your own mortality, you definitely have time to appreciate the little things. I look forward more to what I can do the next day and hope that I can make a difference in others. I am more aware of where my life is going and pay more attention to the things that are really important: the people we love, learning from life and just enjoying my stay in this world as much as I can…